Blaze of Silver (7 page)

And Amal had other fish to fry. While Will waited to hear from Queen Eleanor that he should set off with the ransom now coffered up and waiting at Whitby, Amal was exclusively intent on making himself indispensable to Kamil. He made it clear that he had little desire to return home for, as he told Kamil with apparent regret, there was nothing there to keep him. Deftly and unobtrusively, he took on the role of servant until not only would it have been rude of Kamil to reject
him, but Kamil began to like him. Amal knew how to do things the Arab way. He took trouble to spice Kamil's food and to keep his clothes scrupulously clean. Sometimes they discussed parts of the Koran, and Amal recited Islamic poetry to which Kamil listened with rapt attention. Through all this, Amal was careful to avoid Hosanna. He knew the horse mistrusted him, so he scurried about only with Sacramenta and paused, occasionally, to stroke Shihab's nose. He grew almost invisible, so that Will and Kamil, without realizing it, often discussed the route the ransom was to take in front of him. Kamil sometimes wondered if this was wise, but Will did not think about it at all, for it never occurred to him that Amal might understand more than he let on.

When word came that the Hartslove contingent was to leave for Germany without further delay, Will asked everybody to come to the great hall and hand over his or her contribution to the king's ransom. He had put this off until last, but could put it off no longer. Everybody, he told them, had to give what they could, and he stood, stone-faced, as all the de Granville silver was placed in a chest. Nothing was left out, not the chalices and candlesticks from the chapel; not the silver washing bowls that his mother had brought with her for her dowry; not the jewel-studded sword hilts, tankards, domestic bells, ceremonial knives, and all the presents of any value that he had ever received. All were to be given to the German emperor in exchange for the king.

Fighting back tears, Old Nurse gave Will six silver thimbles that his father had given her the Christmas before leaving on crusade. Then Hal and Marie together
gently dropped in the rings they had shyly and secretly exchanged. For a long hour, the rings lay haphazardly on the top of the pile, and Will forced himself to harden his heart and not pick them out. The only thing he would not accept was Ellie's green jasper necklace, her last, most precious relic of his brother. When she brought that forward he stopped her. “It is not valuable enough,” he said a little lamely, his eyes begging her not to argue. And she did not, but tactfully and gratefully slipped the stones into a little bag at her waist.

Next came Marissa. She did not complain as she parted with the ruby brooch, but she wanted something in return. She waited until Old Nurse had chivvied Elric to his bed after dinner, then launched her assault. It began quite simply. “Why can't I come, too?” she complained to Will. “Why should Ellie be allowed to see something of the world whilst I have to stay here? Please let me go with you. I won't be any trouble, I promise. Please. After all, I did give the ruby brooch and Ellie has kept her necklace.”

Ellie looked up, horrified. She would almost rather give up her necklace than have Marissa come to Germany. To her relief, Will refused point-blank. Then Marissa played her trump card. “I might as well go to a convent then,” she said dramatically so that everybody could hear. “I shall be a nun. In fact, I want to take the veil at the royal abbey at Fontevraud, and I want to do it now. If I can't deliver the ransom, I can pray for it.” Her announcement silenced the hall. A vocation was much to be admired, even if announced in this rather unorthodox fashion. Will heard a small flutter of applause.

He did not applaud though. He laughed. “I don't think you would suit monastic life, Marissa,” he told her. “I really can't see you in the cloister. You'd be like a vixen among hens.” He meant it as a compliment but touchy Marissa chose to take it otherwise.

“Are you saying I am not holy? That God doesn't want me?” she demanded, pushing her trencher away. Conversation in the great hall, which had resumed, stopped.

“Of course not,” Will replied. “I'm just saying that I can't imagine you in a habit, telling your beads and being instantly obedient. You're just like Elric. You argue over everything. Look at you now!”

“Well, I want to take the habit. And, as my guardian, it's your duty to help me.”

Will began to lose patience. “Don't be so silly, Marissa. Even if I thought this a good idea, which I don't, I can't take you at the moment. You know I can't.”

“Because you have more important things to do, like delivering Richard's ransom!” She made it sound as if rescuing the king was a game.

“Of course delivering Richard's ransom is more important,” interrupted Ellie. “You know that perfectly well, Marissa.”

“More important than a vocation? More important than settling me in a convent so that I can pray for the king's well-being? More important than God?” Marissa's voice grew louder.

Kamil looked on with detached interest. Although he and Marissa had been thrown together when he had first arrived in England, they had never got on and now seldom spoke. He found her taunting, unforgiving independence
too abrasive. Marissa had none of Ellie's sweetness. But he had come to admire her. If she were a man, he would want her on his side.

“Oh, come down off your high horse,” said Will, glancing around, embarrassed for the girl. “Fontevraud is in completely the wrong direction for us. It will add weeks to our journey. You can't expect us to trail down to Anjou just for you. Not at this time.”

But nobody was surprised when Marissa refused to listen. She went on and on, with no respite. Will tried to reason with her. He even told her that once Richard was home and things were more settled, he would give her such a dowry that husbands would come flocking. Still she refused to give up. “I don't want your charity,” she said, setting her jaw. “I don't want a dowry. I want to go to Fontevraud and I want to go now. And if you refuse, Will, you will be disappointing God, so he may well wreak his vengeance on you. How will it be if the ransom goes to the bottom of the sea in a storm cooked up especially to punish you? Wouldn't it be better just to take me, then you can go off and deliver your precious ransom with God's protection and my prayers? Think about it, Will. Can you risk setting your face against God's wishes?” Marissa knew just what she was doing. Will might look completely disbelieving, but she had succeeded in sowing doubt among the soldiers and men-at-arms who would accompany him. For many of them, God's wrath was a real and dreaded possibility. Already there were those who were looking questioningly at Will.

In the end, although it was growing dark, Will sent once again to the monastery, but this time for Abbot
Hugh. He would have to sort the girl out. However, the abbot, when he arrived, was unsympathetic and blinked at Will from under his cowl. “But, my son,” he began with what seemed to him was the obvious drawback in Will's argument, “perhaps she really does have a vocation.” Will snorted but the abbot was unmoved. “If you think you know God's ways better than God himself, then you are foolish,” he said, making his voice unusually stern, “and whilst you are young, I did not have you down as foolish.”

“Father Abbot,” Will said, losing his temper bit by bit, “I don't profess to know God's ways, but I do know Marissa's. Her sister, Marie, has settled here well but Marissa wants something she cannot have. It's her way of causing trouble to declare, at this most inconvenient time, that she has a vocation and must go at once to a nunnery. If she does have a vocation”—Will's voice rose triumphantly—“it won't disappear before I get back, will it? Waiting could be a kind of test.”

“And this thing she cannot have, would it be you?” Hugh asked, his voice deliberately mild.

Will flushed. “Yes. But honestly, really honestly, I've given her no encouragement, none at all. I just teach her to ride on Hosanna.”

Hugh considered. “But is that not encouragement? After all, you are not betrothed and she is of an age when girls think of nothing else but marriage—or so I believe,” he added hastily.

Will gave the abbot a withering look, which, fortunately, the shadows hid. “I've told Marissa before that she's not to think of me like that.”

“Very well,” said Hugh, wondering how it was that
Will knew so much about war and so little about women. Will might consider Marissa a child but couldn't he see that Marissa most certainly didn't agree with him? He crossed his hands and made his decision. “I have to say, Will, that a convent really is the best place for her. Quite apart from giving herself to the Lord, she will be off your hands. I am surprised you don't jump at the chance.”

“It's a trick,” said Will bluntly. “She is jealous of Ellie being able to come to Germany with me. All the talk of Fontevraud is just to make sure she is part of our entourage. She knows how far out of our way it is. We are headed for the Rhine and Fontevraud is on the Loire. I know exactly why, too. She thinks that once we're on our journey, we'll not want to stop, and she'll end up coming with us. Or perhaps we'll get to Fontevraud and she'll change her mind. Believe me, Father Abbot, she's capable of anything. I know her.”

“Maybe you do, my son, maybe you do,” said Hugh, “but you must serve God as well as your king even if his requests take strange forms and do not fit in with your plans. A vocation is a precious thing. God will not like it to be squandered. Could you not send the girl with somebody else? There is surely no need to go yourself.”

“That would never work,” Will said, viciously kicking a log in the fire. “Marissa's so difficult and I'm responsible for her. If anybody takes her it must be me. But I can't leave the ransom treasure, either. Where I go, it must go, so couldn't you just talk to Marissa and try to tell her that she must wait?”

“Does she want to talk to me?”

“No.” Will could not lie.

The abbot thought for a moment. “Can you be sure
that if she says she will wait, she will spend her time in prayer and contemplation?”

Will shook his head.

“Then you must take her, my son. The king's ransom is important, but so is God's work. Maybe,” Hugh suggested, “you could deposit her not at Fontevraud but in the new abbey of St. Martin's at Arnhem? That is directly on your way. They need recruits, and my sister Agnes is the sacristan there. The abbess is a true woman of God. And you may yet be surprised. With the right training Marissa may make a good nun.” Hugh got up. With not very good grace, Will kneeled for his blessing. “Hopeless,” he said to Ellie after he had sent the abbot, with gifts, back to the abbey. Ellie said nothing. She did not want Marissa to come on their journey, yet the girl's unhappiness upset her.
If only Marissa were more like Marie
, Ellie thought, then chided herself for being so uncharitable. Marissa might be an irritating and even dangerous nuisance but nobody could deny her bravery and bravery was needed, too. And Ellie had never had to face being an old spinster.

In the early morning, Will asked Marissa again to wait and again she refused. An hour later he gave in and received her strange little smile in return. “I'm sure I shall be happy at Arnhem with the abbot's sister,” she said, “so long as I can get to Fontevraud in the end. After all, that's the best convent for discarded noblewomen to end up in. They say it is where Queen Eleanor herself will go eventually.”

“You are not being discarded,” said Will, angrily rising to her bait.

“Well, you don't want me, do you?”

“Oh, for pity's sake, Marissa! I thought we had been through all that.”

To his discomfort her eyes filled with tears. “But I have no function here,” she said plaintively. “That's the trouble. Ellie's her own mistress, Marie will marry Hal eventually, and I am just the kind of spare girl who moulders away and everybody's relieved when they die. Even if you give me a dowry, who's going to marry me? I've got no land and I limp. Who'll want me, Will? Tell me that.”

Will was embarrassed by the look she gave him. “You must be ready to go in two hours,” he said shortly, “and remember, Marissa, there will be no turning back.” He felt quite out of his depth. Again he missed his father's gruff good sense, and went outside to Hosanna.

After he had gone, Marissa sat in silence. She had got what she wanted. She was not going to be left behind. As she dried her eyes her arrogance returned. Who knew, they might never get to Arnhem, and even if they did, nobody could make her stay. Standing up, she toyed with the idea of rescuing her ruby brooch and was thwarted only by finding the chest locked.
Never mind
, she consoled herself,
at least I am going with it
. And with that she hurried away to pack.

Marie cried as they were leaving, which upset Hal. Old Nurse clucked and took the girl under her wing, all the time glaring at Marissa, who was now settling herself in comfort in a covered wagon and looking as innocent as an angel. “I hope you are kinder to the nuns than you are being to your sister,” she growled as the wagon lurched forward. “God knows why, but she doesn't want you to go.” Marissa didn't answer.

Ellie ignored Marissa and waited to say good-bye to Old Nurse herself. With the more observing eye that comes with parting, she noticed how ancient Old Nurse was beginning to look. Exactly how old she was, Ellie had no idea. For years, the fat lady had not changed at all, but Ellie was conscious that recent events had begun to exact a toll. Old Nurse's comforting plumpness was a little less round; her face a little more withered; and her hands, once so swift and sure, shook and sometimes dropped things. For the first time in her life, it occurred to Ellie that Old Nurse was not immortal and she could see, from Old Nurse's expression, that this thought was shared. The girl stretched her arms as far around the endless waist as was possible and they held
each other tight. “Take care of yourself, Old Nurse,” Ellie whispered. “Eat lots of meat and get the servants to look after you.”