Uncle John’s Facts to Annoy Your Teacher Bathroom Reader for Kids Only!

Uncle John’s Facts to Annoy Your Teacher Bathroom Reader for Kids Only!
Bathroom Readers’ Institute
OUR REGULAR READERS RAVE

Some books print fancy reviews written by critics. Not us! Here at the BRI, we care more about what our faithful readers have to say.

“I got the
Book of Fun
when I was 9 and I am 11 now, and I still can’t put it down. I am always the class clown in school and I would be way boring without your book.”

—Nick

“Your books are awesome, both me and my brother love them. Go with the flow and never quit!”

—Rubaiyat

“The information in your books fascinates me and is so interesting. For Christmas, half of my list is Bathroom Reader books. The coolest things about your books is that all of the facts are so funny.”

—Sabrina

“Hello BRI! You guys rock. I’m a huge fan, and I read your books everyday…my Social Studies teacher thinks I’m never paying attention.”

—Jonathan

“I’m a member of the BRI. And by the way, I love your books. Uncle John, how was life when you were a kid?”

—Ryan

“I love your books so much! I was about 8 or 9 when I got my first Bathroom Reader. It was called
Uncle John’s Book of Fun
. Now I’m 11 and have 6 of your books. My goal is to have all of your books. Keep up the good work, and as you always say…. go with the flow!

—Aaron

“I love Uncle John’s
Wild & Woolly Bathroom Reader
book. It was so funny and I learned a lot of fact about animals! Thank-you Uncle John, and keep writing the good books!”

—Sarah

“I love the Bathroom Readers. They give me random trivia for class and help me look smart.”

—Dylan

“Hi, my name is Steven. I’ve read
Top Secret Bathroom Reader
,
Book of Fun
, the first
Kids Only
, and love them all! I can’t wait until the next one. Thank you Uncle John, Porter, and everyone else in the Bathroom Readers’ Institute for making my life so much better!”

—Steven

By the Bathroom Readers’ Institute

Ashland, Oregon, and San Diego, California

UNCLE JOHN’S
FACTS TO ANNOY YOUR TEACHER
BATHROOM READER FOR KIDS ONLY

Copyright © 2009 by Portable Press. All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews.

“Bathroom Reader,” “Portable Press,” and “Bathroom Readers’ Institute” are registered trademarks of Baker & Taylor, Inc. All rights reserved.

For information, write the Bathroom Readers’ Institute
P.O. Box 1117, Ashland, OR 97520
www.bathroomreader.com
e-mail:
[email protected]

ISBN-13: 978-1-60710-668-5
E-book edition: September 2012

10 11 12 13 14 15   8 7 6 5 4 3 2

THANK YOU!

The Bathroom Readers’ Institute thanks the following people whose help made this book possible.

Gordon Javna

Gordon Javna

JoAnn Padgett

Melinda Allman

Andy Peterson

Brian Boone

Dan Mansfield

Jeff Altemus

Amy Miller

Jay Newman

Michael Brunsfeld

Julia Papps

Myles Callum

Vickey Kalambakal

Cathy Hall

Debbie Pawlak

Katherine Butler

Katy Duffield

Leslie Elman

Rose Kivi

Liana Mahoney

Jenny Burr

Louise Peacock

J. Carroll

Jennifer Mercer

Peggy Deland

Malcolm Hillgartner

Terry Miller Shannon

Kathryn Grogman

Suzanne Francis

William I. Lengeman

Amy L. and Lisa M.

Monica Maestas

Sydney Stanley

David Cully

Ginger Winters

Jennifer Frederick

David Calder

Karen Malchow

Erin Corbin

R. R. Donnelley

Sophie and Bea

Porter the Wonder Dog

Hiya Brendan! Hiya Max! Hiya Kelly!

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Because the BRI understands your reading needs, we’ve divided the contents by length as well as subject:

Short:
A quick read

Medium:
2 pages

Long:
3 to 4 pages (That’s not too long, is it?)

9 PRANKS TO DRIVE YOUR TEACHER CRAZY

Short

How to Make a Spitball

Medium

How to Makea Voodoo Doll

Who Said That?

Cool Card Tricks

Ready, Set, Fly!

Abracadabra! (It’s Science)

Fart, Fart, Whistle

How to Make a Bloody Eyeball

How to Make Chocolate Bugs

GROSS STUFF

Short

The Dirt on Dirt

Ewww! Boogers!

Mmmm Brains

Smelly Science

Fart Facts

Medium

Sweat 101

Long

Toenails

This Story Really Stinks!

MOUTHING OFF

Short

Wise Guys

Freethinkers

Dim Stars

Bright Stars

COWGIRLS AND COWBOYS

Medium

Wild (West) Child

Long

Ride ’Em, Cowgirl!

Saddle Up!

KOOKY GROWN-UPS

Medium

The Fart Man

The Presidents’ Report Cards

You Are So Annoying!

Long

The House that Sarah Built

Walk on Water

All Aboard the Junk Raft!

Bear Haven

JOKES, GAMES, AND PUZZLES

Short

Who Am I?

Toon-emies

Brainteasers

Annoying Jokes

Yuk, Yuk, Yuk

Medium

Drive Your Teacher Nuts

15 Ways to Get Detention

UNCLE JOHN’S MYSTERIES

Medium

The Case of the Kidnapped Kid

The Case of the Gooey Spitball

GREAT ESCAPES

Long

Let Me Outta Here!

Escaping the Rock

Beyond the Wall

TALES THE TEACHER TOLD

Short

Wrong Facts

Wrong Facts

Wrong Facts

Bad Advice

Wrong Facts

Wrong Facts

Medium

Myth-conceptions

Long

The Great Railroad Ruse

The Truth About Sea Monsters

Does Money Grow on Trees?

PLEASE RAISE YOUR HAND

Medium

Ask the Experts

Long

Animal Crazy

FIELD TRIP

Medium

Museums That Are Fun!

Welcome to Wormtown

Thumper Meets Bumper

Crazy Contests

Le McDonald’s

Things to Do if You’re Dead

COOL HISTORY

Medium

Flying High

Long

The Real Red Baron

They Were Ahead of Their Time

First Day on the Job

The Great Houdini

Code Talkers

OOPS!

Short

Sports Stupidity

Dumb Crooks

Change the Name!

Bizarre News

Blooper Reel

Medium

25 Ways to Spell Shaxberd

Science Goofs

Dumb Crooks

Long

Presidential Goofs

GOLD DIGGERS

Medium

Real Treasure Hunting

Another Real Treasure Hunt

Dig Like an Egyptian

Long

Blackbeard’s Loot

KID POWER

Medium

Kids Rule!

Toys = Money in the Bank

Long

Fairy Tale

Beating the Grown-ups

We’ve Got Rights

FOR THE RECORD

Short

Record Breakers

Medium

Bizarre Records

The Smallest

The Biggest

IF ANIMALS RULED THE WORLD

Medium

Bizarre Animal Acts

Sting and Bite

Ruff Politics

Copycats

More Bizarre Animal Acts

SHHHH

Short

Gossip!

Bad Words

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