Authors: Tamsyn Murray
Smudge flicked his tail smugly and padded indoors to his roomy, fur-lined cat bed. Grinding my teeth, I hopped inside and immediately bumped my nose on the back wall. EE sniggered, then turned it into a cough when Susie glared at him. If I didn’t know better I’d say EE enjoyed moving me into a Z-list hutch. Maybe now you see why I call him Evil Edward.
The way I won my place on the
TV show is the stuff of legend. From the moment TV presenter Gloria Goodwood saw me pull off a perfect bunny backflip at our church village fair, I’ve never looked back. She invited me to take part in the
Superpets Search for a Superstar
and, after a gruelling audition process, the public voted me the winner and my life changed forever. I was no longer a boring pet bunny, I was Harriet Houdini: Stunt Bunny! And, just like every other star, I had my share of crazy fans, like the Great Maldini, who tried to kidnap me for his magic act.
During the auditions I’d made some great friends, like Cherry the counting kitten and Lulu the hula-hooping chimp. Unfortunately, I’d made a couple of enemies too – Doodle the opera-singing poodle and her owner, Miranda. They thought they were better than all the other contestants. So, when I scooped first place in the final and Doodle and Miranda stormed off the stage in a huff, I didn’t mind. In fact, I didn’t care if I never saw them again. And I might not have done, if Gloria hadn’t come up with a little surprise to keep us busy when
had a month long Easter break from filming.
‘Ah, Mr Wilson, I’m glad I caught you,’ she said, bustling over to EE as he cleared my dressing table up after we’d finished the last show. ‘Do you have time for a quick chat?’
Now, it’s no secret in the Wilson household that EE goes a bit funny when Gloria is around. His cheeks turn pink, a big, goofy smile crosses his face and his tongue gets tied up in knots. Mrs Wilson says sniffily that he’s got a thing’ about Gloria Goodwood. I don’t know about that, but it does make him look very odd.
‘Grnf,’ he said, nodding his head up and down. ‘Defsolutely.’
Gloria’s smile slipped a little bit. ‘Er – good. Well, I’ve got some exciting news. We’re taking Superpets on the road in a special tour called
and we’d love Harriet to take part. She’s bound to be the star of the show!’
My ears stood on end as I imagined my name at the top of the posters. I liked the idea of being the headline act! And the more time I spent away from cramped Cosy Cottage, the better. I’d have to persuade Smudge to do some damage whilst I was away – he needed a new scratching post, maybe he could use the legs of my hutch . . .
‘I was thinking of six or seven dates over two weeks,’ Gloria went on. ‘We’ll be staying at the best hotels, of course, and you’ll both be well looked after.’
I twitched my whiskers in irritation. What did she mean, ‘both’? If she thought I was spending a whole two weeks on my own with EE, she had another thing coming! It wasn’t as though he even did anything interesting – his idea of fun was snoozing in front of the snooker on TV with a cup of cocoa. No, if we were going on tour, Susie
to come with us.
But EE’s face lit up and I knew he was imagining himself staying in a luxury hotel. He coughed. ‘That sounds nery vice, Miss Goodwood.’
‘Oh, please,’ Gloria said, patting his arm. ‘Call me Gloria.’
EE’s cheeks turned even pinker. ‘Will it be just us on the tour, G-Gloria?’
Gloria smiled. ‘Oh, no, there’ll be lots of other pets from the show and the auditions.’ She looked at the clipboard in her hand. ‘Let’s see, we have Cherry the counting kitten, Trevor’s terrific tumbling terrapins, Lulu the chimp and Spike-tacular, the hedgehog dance group. Oh, and Doodle the opera- singing poodle. You remember her, don’t you?’
The last time I’d seen Doodle, she’d been up to her snooty nose in pond water and very unhappy with me. It was a memory that had cheered up many a boring hour in my bunny hutch, but I wasn’t jumping for joy that she’d be on the tour too. If I knew Doodle and her owner Miranda, they’d be looking for a way to get their own back on me.
‘It sounds great.’ EE was beaming at Gloria. ‘I’ll book the time off work. Just name the date and we’ll be there!’
He was right, I decided after they’d sorted out all the details and EE was carrying me back to the car; it did sound great. The only real problem was Doodle. What dirty tricks would she and Miranda have up their sleeves this time?
It wasn’t until we got home and EE spilled the beans about
that I realised he really wasn’t planning to take Susie. Great, I was going to be stuck with him after all. Susie didn’t look very happy either.
‘But who will tuck Harriet in at night and read her a story?’ she asked, her blue eyes filling with tears and her bottom lip starting to wobble.
EE threw me a brisk look. ‘I’m sure Harriet will be far too busy practising her backflips to need a bedtime story.’ Folding her arms, Susie said, ‘Of course she’ll want a story. And she needs lots of toys and her special fluffy blanket too.’
Susie was too well behaved to stamp her foot, but I wasn’t. I thumped hard on the living room floor to make sure everyone knew I was not a happy bunny.