“And you don’t think he’s got any malicious intentions?”
“No,” she answered automatically and knew it was true.
“I agree.”
“You agree?” Ariel’s jaw nearly hit the floor. “She who is
paranoid about everyone’s intentions doesn’t think this was on purpose or part
of some evil world domination plot?”
Mary Ellen walked out of the stall and shut the door behind
her. She turned to give the horse one final scratch between the ears before
turning around.
“I think that I’m cautious, not paranoid. After meeting the
both of them and listening to Pete—who has no dog in this fight, really—I think
it was just one of those freak things that nobody but God can explain. And I
can understand why he would be nervous explaining it to you. It does sound a
little out there. But weird things happen.”
“Well.” Ariel didn’t know what to think about that. “Sounds
like you and Pete had a good conversation.”
“We did.” She brushed her hands on the legs of her jeans and
walked to the utility sink to wash up. “He was a nice guy to pass the time
with. But I won’t miss him, and he won’t miss me.”
Ariel wished she could say the same. How easy it would have
been to not feel a thing for Trav, to not feel invested or connected at all.
But she did feel for him, more than she wanted to.
“You don’t think your relationship with Donovan isn’t going
anywhere anyway, right?”
“I…”
“Ariel. He’s leaving.” Mary Ellen plopped down on the
workbench, stirring up dust. She tugged Ariel’s arm until she sat. “I hate
seeing you hurt. And if you continue to let your heart run away on some
half-baked, never-gonna-happen relationship, you’ll be crushed. I know it.”
Her mind agreed. She let that soak in. Let her mind review
the pain and heartache she was running headlong into by knowingly falling for a
man who was leaving. A man who, by definition of his job, had no real roots,
when all she wanted to do was bloom in one place.
“I know. I agree. I need to pull back. But before I do,
there’s something I have to do.”
“What?”
Ariel leaned on one hip and took her phone out of her
pocket.
Chapter Nine
I believe you.
A
Trav read the text for the seventeenth time as he sat in the
overstuffed leather armchair in the lobby of his hotel. Ariel had asked him to
meet her there, but he had no clue why.
His head snapped up as the revolving door whirled, but
instead of Ariel, a middle-aged bald man walked into the lobby. She was late
and his nerves were shot just waiting. He read the comforting text once more to
calm himself.
“Hey.”
Trav jumped and almost dropped his phone. Ariel stood over
him, a smile on her lips. Trained insurgents couldn’t get the drop on him, but
one woman who consumed his mind managed to scare the shit out him in a hotel
lobby.
“Snuck up on me.”
Her smile widened. “Yeah, well, you looked preoccupied with
your phone.” She plopped down in the chair next to his and settled in. “Comfy.
So, had any luck finding Sarah?”
That came out of left field. “No. None at all. Showed her
picture around the area, but nothing.”
Ariel was silent for a minute, staring blankly at the flat
screen above the fireplace with some morning news show on it. “Have you tried
your family? Do you have any family in the area still?”
The question made Trav pause. How much to share? But he knew
the answer. If he wanted to gain her trust fully and keep it, it was time to
share.
“Wanna take a ride?”
She didn’t hesitate. “Yeah.”
“Let’s get in the car and I’ll explain more.”
Ariel followed Trav out to the parking lot. She stayed
close, but Trav never made a move to touch her. He still wasn’t sure how she
felt, what she wanted. So he’d give her some room until she was more clear.
After they were in the car and pulling out of the parking
lot, Trav spoke again.
“My mom left when we were young. I was nine. Sarah was
five,” he started, keeping his eyes on the road.
“I’m sorry,” Ariel murmured.
“At first I did the whole ‘blame myself’ thing. I think most
kids go through that. But as I got older, it was obvious she left because she
couldn’t stand my dad. And then I just hated her for not taking us with her.”
“I’m sure she would have if she could,” Ariel tried.
“No. She wouldn’t,” he corrected quickly. “Not everyone
wants kids. Or wants them enough to make sacrifices. Not everyone has parents
like yours, Ariel. Who not only want the kid they have but adopt another one
from a bad situation.” He glanced over and saw her face redden. “I didn’t mean
it like that. I’m sure you understand that. It’s just…that’s not the case here.
She left and she never looked back. And we were stuck with our father.”
Ariel didn’t say a word, so he went on.
“He never raised a hand to us and we never went without. He
wasn’t abusive in that sense.”
“But there are so many other forms of abuse,” Ariel
murmured.
She understood. He knew she would. “There are. We couldn’t
do anything right. He never supported any dreams. I took the brunt of it, I
think. In his eyes women weren’t really meant for much so Sarah got ignored
more often than not,” he scoffed. “Lucky her. But I was the big brother and it
was my job to keep her sheltered.”
“You would see it that way.” Ariel’s voice carried an odd
tone and he glanced at her. But she was still staring ahead.
“It got worse as I got older. And I said the second I
graduated high school, I was outta there. And I kept my word. Took my high
school diploma to the recruiter’s office and left as soon as I could for boot
camp. It wasn’t my first choice for jobs, but it was the best way of getting as
far away from that man as I could with only a high school diploma. I respected
the Corps, and loved being a part of the Military Police, it gave me ten great
years. But I quickly got sick of feeling like I was still running, looking over
my shoulder.”
“What about Sarah?”
Trav’s stomach turned. “That was the problem. My best guess
is that after I left, he went from ignoring her to transferring that rage and
eternal irritation from me to her. At first she was so proud of me, before I
left. Told everyone her brother was going to be a Marine. Wrote me in boot. But
then the letters stopped.”
“What happened?”
“No clue. I would call home but my father would hear my
voice and hang up. I was dead to him. Occasionally he’d mutter an obscenity
before I got the dial tone. But never any word of Sarah. And time off has been
hard to get, so trips home weren’t always possible.”
“You never heard from her?”
Trav took the turn that would take him by his old
neighborhood. “I wrote to her constantly, gave her all my contact info. I even
mailed the letters to the high school to make sure she’d get them. But she only
got in contact with me once after that. One phone call, the day she turned
eighteen, from her cell phone.”
“My number,” Ariel murmured.
“Exactly. She thinks I abandoned her or left her behind. I
don’t know if that was her teenage brain dramatizing the whole thing or if our
father managed to convince her of that out of sheer spite. No matter what I
said, she wouldn’t listen. Hung up on me, never answered another call or text.
After I got back from Afghanistan this time, I just knew I needed to get
serious about finding her.”
He pulled onto the street he grew up on. No fond feelings of
nostalgia swarmed him, no cozy memories of mom’s homemade cookies. But he
didn’t feel the itching need to leave, either. It was just another street in
another neighborhood. The car coasted to a stop in front of his father’s house.
As he and Ariel climbed out of the rental, he took stock.
The house was meticulously kept up, as always. Nothing separated it from the
other houses on the block but bad memories. He walked up the driveway but
stopped before walking up the path to the front door and turned to Ariel.
“You don’t have to come up there with me. Matthew Donovan is
not a decent man, there’s really no telling what he’ll say.”
Ariel’s mouth was set in a mulish line and her brows furrowed.
“I’m coming. Let’s go,” she said with a little push on his back to get him
moving again.
Trav walked up the steps and rang the doorbell. He told
himself it was only his imagination on overdrive accounting for the unwelcome
vibes. They stood and waited a full two minutes before he said, “Guess I’ll
have to try again later.”
They’d turned to walk back down the steps when the door
opened behind them.
“What the fuck do you want?”
Trav turned, teeth and fists clenched, and stepped in front
of Ariel.
His father stood in the doorway, arms crossed. The signs of
passing years were there. His hair was completely silver, though still full.
More lines creased his face. And he’d gained some weight. But clearly his surly
disposition was still the same as ever.
“Good to see you too, Dad.” Trav walked back up the steps
and held out a hand, intent on at least trying. For Sarah’s sake.
His father glanced down at the offered hand and backed up,
never uncrossing his arms. “What do you want?”
Trav gave up the attempt at civility and shoved both hands
in his front pockets. “I want to see Sarah.”
At the mention of his daughter’s name, Matthew sneered. “Too
fucking bad. She doesn’t live here anymore. Took off after graduation just like
you. Ungrateful bitch.”
Trav’s hands balled into fists in his pockets. He took a
step forward but Ariel’s hand on his upper arm stalled him.
“Do you have any idea where she went?” Ariel’s voice was low
and calm. Trav felt his quickly boiling blood cool at the soothing sound.
“Forwarding address, new phone number, anything?”
Matthew’s eyes shifted to Ariel. “Wouldn’t tell you if I did
know.”
When Trav would have lunged, Ariel wrapped her arms around
him, hugging his back to her chest. “Shh,” she said into his shirt. “Let’s just
go.” She pivoted, still holding her arms around him and he had no choice but to
follow or fall.
“Go ahead, walk away like the pussy you are,” his father
taunted. “Never were worth shit as a kid. Nothing’s changed, huh?”
His father’s curses serenaded them on the walk back to the
car. But just before Trav opened the door for Ariel, he turned back. Matthew
was still framed in the doorway.
“Just so you know, I’m moving back to the area.” He gave
himself a moment to revel in his father’s stunned silence. “And if you approach
me or mine, ever, you’ll live to regret it. That includes Sarah, if she’s
around here, or anyone else that I care about.”
He opened the door for a slack-jawed Ariel and gently guided
her into the passenger seat. After sliding in the driver’s side, he started the
car and pulled away. Ariel said nothing, which gave him a chance to reflect on
his impulsive announcement.
The moment he walked away—with Ariel’s help—he knew that the
running was over. No, if he thought back, it was before that. His father’s
words and disappointment stopped mattering years ago. But this one trip was the
final confirmation he needed.
And now he could start over. Again.
Now the biggest question was what role—if any—Ariel would
play in his new life.
* * * * *
Moving to the area?
The announcement stunned her. She hadn’t been able to say a
word on the ride back to the hotel. Even as Trav parked, she wasn’t sure what
to say. He opened her car and she stepped out, then wondered what to do next.
Get in her own car and drive off? Walk him to the hotel room?
The decision was made for her when he took her hand, linked
fingers with hers and headed for the front doors of the hotel. She tagged along
behind him through the lobby, stood quietly next to him in the elevator and was
dragged down the hallway into his room. He shut the door behind them and pushed
her back against it, covering her with his warm body. His mouth slammed down on
hers with an urgency she couldn’t ignore.
She ground her hips up, feeling the ridge of his erection,
and he returned the pressure, pushing her harder into the door. He groaned into
her mouth and his fingers tangled in her hair, pulling her head to the side for
better access. She looped one leg over his hips, creating a cocoon with her
body and urging him closer, if it was even possible. She hated the layers of
clothing between them. Wanted to feel his cock pressing against her, into her,
with the same intensity.
His hand streaked under her shirt, knocking her bra askew as
he reached for her breast. No gentle exploration, just hard possession and a
sharp pinch of her nipple. She gasped and then the contact was gone.
She let the door prop her up as she opened her eyes. He
stood two feet in front of her, chest heaving, eyes still hungry. But he turned
away and started to pace.
Ariel took advantage of the moment his back was turned and
straightened her bra and shirt, then sat on the bed to wait until he was ready
to talk. It didn’t take long.
“I’m sorry.” He didn’t stop pacing, didn’t look at her, but
she knew he was sincere. “I’m an ass, that was wrong.”
“I didn’t mind. In case you missed it, I was enjoying
myself.”
Finally, he turned toward her and rubbed a hand over the
back of his neck. “No excuse. Just adrenaline and frustration and I had no
right to take it out on you.”
“Stop. Seriously, stop apologizing about that. I wanted it
just as much as you did and I can say no when I mean it. I didn’t want you to
stop.”
“You didn’t,” he said slowly, as if he were afraid to
believe her.
“No.” When he didn’t move, she stood. “Trav, finish what you
started.” She wanted to add
please
to the end, but she knew he didn’t
need or want softness. He needed release, he needed some way to let go of the
frustration, the feeling of hopelessness.