The day wore on and Wynter became increasingly restless. Her skin crawled. Her ears rang. Her stomach growled in hunger, despite eating as Logan had told her to do. Wringing her hands up into her hair, she pulled at the blonde springy tendrils, causing a twinge of pain. Sickening as it was, it salved the unending need to scratch and bite. Holed up in the bedroom, she tried to sleep it off, but had only managed a small nap. Logan advised her not to wear constricting clothing, so she’d thrown on a sundress sans underwear. It was far too suffocating; her skin felt raw and chafed against the soft cotton.
She hated that she was changing. None of what had happened had been in her control. Unfair and hurtful. Her parents dying. Being forced to live with Jax. Held captive for months. And now forced against her will to shift into an animal. She despised it. She’d have to make the only choice she had which was to carry on and endure it. Headstrong and determined, she pounded down the stairs, ready to face her Alpha.
Logan had planned a surprise, but things weren’t going well. By late afternoon, Wynter had grown more and more uncomfortable and cranky. Unsure what they’d done to her to turn her wolf, he couldn’t be certain how smoothly she’d shift. In only a few short hours, they’d know. He hated seeing her in such pain and abhorred the fact that he couldn’t control it. That was what he did well: control, dominate. Yet hour after hour, it became more apparent that they’d have to let nature take her course.
By the time Wynter came downstairs, Logan noticed that she looked wild with agitation. Sexy as ever, her unruly curls sprang in all directions. Despite her discomposure, he knew her wolf would be amazing, but he thought better of telling her. For now, he’d orchestrate a diversion of sorts, a lesson on the bayou. He smiled as he led her outside to the waiting airboat. Nothing was more fun, and he suspected it would give her a rush, interrupting the cycle of negative thoughts playing in her mind.
“What is this?” she asked, not sure what they were doing on the docks.
“It’s a boat,” Logan answered with a wink.
“Yeah, I see that. Is it safe? I don’t want to get eaten by alligators. Really, I’ve had enough fanged creatures sinking their teeth into me lately.”
“Nothin’ safer. This is our home, chérie and we’re goin’ to show it to you,” he drawled, doing his best imitation of his beta. “We promise to keep you away from the snakes…even though we might eat them later. Maybe go crawfishin’.”
“Don’t let him fool you, cher. Logan may be a city boy, but he knows his way ’round the swamp…almost as well as I do. Wait ’til you see him pet the gators. He likes to kiss those pretty lips,” Dimitri joked.
“Hey now, I may have been up north for the past fifty years, but it’s like ridin’ a bike. And hell, I’ve well made up for it these past couple of months,” Logan told them. “And he’s wrong about the lips…it’s their nice white teeth that I like to see.”
Wynter rolled her eyes. “As long as those pearly whites stay far away from me, we’ll be good to go. Remember, I’m a city girl.”
“Ah well, we’ll see about that after you shift, baby.” Logan gave her shoulder a comforting squeeze. “First, we’re gonna go out into the lake a bit, and then we’ll take you back in the swamp so you can see it in the daylight. And then, we’ll boat on over to our running grounds.”
Wynter eyed them both suspiciously.
See it in the daylight?
What was that supposed to mean? He did not think she’d be going into a swamp at night? Not happening.
“Here ya go.” Logan handed her a pair of yellow earmuffs as Dimitri fired up the engine. With a small smile, she promptly put them on, cautiously looking forward to her boating adventure.
By the time they’d sped through the lake and hit the swamp, Wynter’s body thrummed in exhilaration. The rush of the wind and intermittent spray of water combined with the speed sent her heart racing. She was having fun. It had been so long, she barely recognized the sensation. Smiling from ear to ear, she glanced over to Logan who was pointing to blooming bushes of swamp-rose mallow. The hibiscus petals, in white and pink, brought a splash of color to the otherwise green and brown landscape.
Dimitri cut the engine, and they all took off their earmuffs. Wynter scanned the horizon, astonished at the beauty all around her. Insects sang in the twilight. Blue sky and clouds reflected in the water as the sun went down. Ancient cypress trees stood proud, their knees poking up toward the heavens. Logan tapped her shoulder and held his fingers to his lips to quiet any potential conversation. He pointed to a great white egret poised immobile, hunting for his next meal. The majestic bird took notice of them drifting toward the bank, and took off in flight toward another fishing ground.
“It’s unbelievable,” she said, swiveling her head.
“Hey Ace,” Dimitri called. He dug out a small bucket. A prehistoric swish of a tail followed and eyes rose above the water. “Come on over here.”
Wynter reached for Logan’s hand and turned so she could watch.
“D likes to feed his boy,” Logan commented.
“Ace? How does he know that’s the same one?”
“They’re territorial. And live a long time too. This is his spot. There’s a few of his girls…see there on the bank.” Logan called attention to a couple of alligators who were basking in the final rays of the sun.
Wynter watched in great delight as Dimitri held up the raw chicken. The reptile lurched out of the water and snapped it up.
“Amazing,” Wynter gasped, grinning at the same time.
“They’re just a small part of the ecosystem. This place…it’s special.”
“Do you all come here a lot?”
“Not enough. As much as I love this place, I’m in the city a lot of the time. Even when I lived in Philly, we split our time between the city and mountains. It’s the same here. Poor D is goin’ to have to get used to livin’ in the French Quarter. But you can’t really run wolf in town, so if we want to go for a run, this is the place.”
“You run in the swamp?”
“Yes and no, cher. We’ve got lots of open land that’s easier to run on but if need be, we know how to walk in the swamp,” Dimitri explained.
“But we’ll save that lesson for another day,” Logan finished.
“We’d better head out. It’s just about time to hit the preserve. Who’s up for a sunset?” Dimitri asked. He wiped his hands on a towel and readied to start up the engine.
“Thanks for bringing me here. I love it…it’s breathtaking.” Wynter tried to hide the emotion rushing up into her throat but a traitorous tear fell. She swiped her finger at her eye, capturing it. With a small smile, she sighed.
“It’s going to be okay. Just stick with your wolves, baby.” Logan kissed her cheek.
A subtle sense of relief showered his conscience, knowing she liked the swamp. Even though he’d grown up in the French Quarter, his parents had made sure he’d spent plenty of time running in what at that time was considered the ‘far country’. Good thing, too, because over the centuries, the city had grown, sprawled over its open spaces and now this land belonged to his wolves. It represented his culture. The bayou. The swamp. Home to his wolf.
Her words of admiration soothed his need for her acceptance. He supposed he hadn’t realized just how important it was that she’d approved of his home, the way he lived. A house he could change, but everything else? No, she’d either welcome or reject his world. A final test, the pack, awaited not just her, but him as well.
As the motor roared, Logan wrapped his hand over hers. His gut told him that she could do it. It might not be easy, but fuck easy. Nothing lately in their lives had been easy but that didn’t equate to impossible. Like his challenges, he’d won them all right but not without difficulty. Nonetheless, victory had been all the more sweet. He’d kill to make this work, but knew she’d have to fight on her own. And then she’d face the pack. No, not easy. But sometimes the best things in life were hard and well worth the fight.
Dimitri stayed back to tie off the boat. He watched his Alpha and mate through the trees, sensing the struggle. In all his years, he’d never known a human to shift. They were born wolves, not made. Yet defying nature, this was going down. He hadn’t told Logan, but he was seriously worried about the pack’s reaction to Wynter. Not only was she from New York, she was human. Sure, the pack would welcome a mate for their Alpha, but they’d expected her to be one of their own, and without a doubt, wholly wolf.
The she-wolves had been chasing around Logan since he’d replaced Marcel. Luci, especially, had staked her unofficial claim by continuing to live with Logan. Up until several days ago, she’d made it her daily ritual to knock on Logan’s bedroom door. And while he knew Logan had only comforted her, Luci wasn’t going to take his impending mating well.
Cognizant that Logan had been busy with Wynter and also Dana’s death, Dimitri had hesitated to broach the subject with him. But tonight, he was prepared to step in and assist. And that didn’t just include helping Wynter sexually. Yes, he’d grown fond of the little wolf. But at the moment, he was more concerned about her safety. Dimitri had already decided that he’d step in and stop a fight, if necessary. Sure, he’d take a hard hit for intervening but so be it. A direct challenge to Wynter wouldn’t negate her status as Logan’s mate, but still, it was within a she-wolf’s right to attack and kill if necessary. If someone challenged Wynter and she lost, it would further distract Logan from leading the pack. Within days if not hours, another challenge for Alpha might be issued. Logan had promised to kill the next wolf who challenged him, and Dimitri was confident he’d make good on his word
No matter how sexually adventurous she’d felt, Wynter’s human notions clashed with her emerging wolf. She watched as Logan stood naked before her, cajoling her to shuck the dress. Wynter reluctantly undressed and immediately covered her breasts with her hands. Realizing that the rest of her body was already exposed, she forced her arms to her sides.
“Come here, Wyn,” he told her. Magnanimously nude, she was a spectacular sight, Logan thought. “You trust me?”
“Yes,” she responded quietly, looking at her feet. She could feel Logan and Dimitri’s eyes on her skin. She was frightened out of her wits. No matter how much she’d told herself this was going to happen, she still wasn’t prepared.
A surge of nausea rolled her stomach. Reacting, she bent over, her hands on her knees, willing her stomach to hold the food. She coughed and gagged, managing to push the bile back down her esophagus.
Please God. I will not throw up…no throwing up…especially in front of Logan. Be brave. I can do this. No, I will do this.
She closed her eyes and took a deep cleansing breath. With a whoosh, she blew it out through her mouth.
Logan is with me.
Logan. Oh shit. She’d almost forgotten he was watching her ridiculous panic attack. She stood up and gave him an apologetic smile.
“Are you okay? As gross as it is, if you need to throw up, go ahead. Believe me, you wouldn’t be the first.”
“You’re being nice.”
Logan smiled. “Well, it’s the pups who usually hurl their first time, but you’re kind of like a pup.”
She shot him an annoyed look, her hands on her hips.
“Okay, more like a super-hot, naked human lady wolf,” he laughed. “Seriously, baby. Nothing and I mean nothing bad is going to happen tonight. We’ll shift. We’ll run. We’ll make love.” His voice was low and dominant, guiding her wolf.
She simply nodded, allowing him to take her hand in his.
“Look at me, sweetheart,” Logan instructed. When her eyes met his, he continued. “I’m sorry this happened to you…I really am. No matter how much I want you as my mate, I’d never force a shift on you. It sucks. It’s not fair, even. But there’s no stopping nature. This is like skiing, baby. Sure, it’s a little dangerous. You will most definitely fall. Probably will be sore afterwards. And a little dirty. But most certainly, you will have fun. And before you go hatin’ my analogy, you’ve never been skiing with me…and you will love it.”
“I like skiing,” she disclosed with a small smile. “I’m from New York.”
“And someday, we’ll do that together too. But today, you’ll shift. So let’s do this thing, okay?”
“Okay.” As soon as she’d agreed, her skin tingled as if she’d stuck her finger in an electrical socket. She looked up at the full moon. As if it reached out with a firm hand striking into her heart, she seized, unable to speak.
Logan saw Wynter freeze and knew immediately it had begun. Damn, this was not how a pup or anyone was supposed to shift. It shouldn’t be done under duress. Transformation was a celebratory milestone. Logan focused within, drawing on his inherent Alpha power, attempting to soothe her mind. But her immobility continued and within seconds, she began to shake uncontrollably, saliva dripping from her mouth as if she’d gone into a full grand mal seizure.
Logan put his hands onto her cheeks, forcing her to look at him, but her vacant stare told him she was lost within her own mind. Dimitri sensed trouble and ran to his assistance, but Logan waved him off with a hand. He and he alone would coax her out of the paralysis that had taken over her body.
“Wynter, concentrate on my voice. Listen to me. No matter what’s going on inside of you, I know you can hear me. I’m your Alpha. And as such, you will do as I say. Your wolf. She knows this. And you do too. You need to let go. Let me in.” Goddess, it shouldn’t be this way. He hated to be harsh with her but he needed to force her wolf to the surface. “Close your eyes.”
Unresponsive, Wynter continued to quiver.
“Close. Your. Eyes. This is an order from your Alpha. Do it now,” he growled.
Recognition registered in her pupils. Her lids flickered but still didn’t shut. Her wolf rolled submissively onto her back, yelping in response. At his voice, she struggled, clawing to get out, to run with her mate.
Small though it was, Logan knew she’d heard him. He’d have to be more forceful. A dominant, almost foreign voice emerged. “Wynter, I’m commanding you to shift. Now close. Your. Eyes.”
Logan’s authoritative directive speared through the palpable numbness that had arrested Wynter’s muscles. As if someone had smashed a rock through a pane of glass, her humanity shattered into pieces. Her eyes snapped shut, and the wolf emerged. Utter agony ensued as the metamorphosis completed. Gagged by the shift, her scream pinged within her own consciousness, and she thought she’d died. Mouth opened, no tortured cry would save her. But within seconds, she heard a howl pierce the night air. Blinking her eyes, she realized the animalistic noise had come from her. For it was she, the wolf, acknowledging her shift, calling to her mate. As Logan came into focus, she caught sight of his proud smile.