Animalis (21 page)

Chapter 17

Regeneration

After breakfast, Jax headed back to his room to give his leg a rest. When he had left the group of Animalis who were still cleaning in the kitchen, he got down on his hands and knees to crawl. The knot had stretched down and was starting to cramp up the middle of his foot. And the stump hadn’t stopped throbbing, either.

He took out the pins that held the folded end of the pant leg and pulled the fabric back to reveal the leg. The skin really had moved in fast, hadn’t it? And there were several tiny lumps that had starting to form near the center.

Jax sprawled out on the bed, trying not to imagine a gruesome death by leg infection. The arena fight wasn’t a dream. It wasn’t going away. Tomorrow, he’d wake up and the leg would still be gone. And what was he going to do the rest of his life?

There was a knock at his door and Jax realized he had fallen asleep.

“Jax?” Grimshaw said. “Hodge has something for you.” She sounded excited.

He was exhausted, but sat up before she came in.

“Everything went well?” Jax asked. “You’re back—everyone made it back?”

Grimshaw nodded but held her finger to her lips and glanced at Hodge, who had followed behind her. He held something behind his back.

“I’ll tell you later,” she said.

“Now, it’s not going to be very comfortable. No, I wouldn’t like it at all. I don’t even like these clothes. Tore off my first clothes when I was a pup. But I hope you like this, Jax. I hope you really like it.” Hodge’s tail was flipping back and forth through the air.

He pulled his arms out from behind his back, revealing a mass of harnesses and a robotic foot. Beneath a semitransparent plastic outer case were motors, gears, and power cells, crammed together into an intricate reproduction of human muscles.

Jax dropped his hands away and stared at it with a blank expression. He felt hollow.

“It’s for your leg!” Grimshaw said. She picked it up out of Hodge’s hands and brought it to the bed. She knelt down and held the piece of metal up for Jax to see.

He pulled away from it. “No. I don’t need that.” He tried to laugh. “That’s … I couldn’t use that.”

“Do you want to try it on?” Grimshaw’s face sparkled like it was Christmas.

“It’s just … The end of the leg is still so sensitive.” He looked at Hodge. “I can’t use that, Hodge.”

They both held on to their excitement. Grimshaw looked at Hodge.

“There are lots of designs to choose from,” Hodge said. “This one is specific for sensitive limbs. See these cables?” Hodge pointed to thick, vertical lines starting from varied heights on the harness, and extending to varied depths on the robot ankle. “Those all capture the weight of your body, and bypass the tip of the leg.”

Jax chanced another glance at the robot limb and felt his stomach acid curdle. He did want it. He wanted it to make him normal, so he could walk, run, jump, and pretend nothing had ever happened. And it was that desire that made him want to throw it and cry.

“Are you alright?” Grimshaw asked.

Jax kept the prosthetic dangling in front of him. He could just wear it, not think about it. What was there to fight against anymore? It wouldn’t hurt anything … He could just give up again and let it happen.

“It’s … Can you show me how to put it on?” he managed to say.

Grimshaw glowed with excitement. “It’ll be easy. Maybe you’ll forget that you ever even lost it.”

——

Walking on the robotic leg hadn’t seemed like a challenge until Jax had to move to avoid the young Animalis scurrying through the cramped courtyard within the ACTS compound. The weight was unnatural, and threw off his sense of balance. But it didn’t aggravate the sensitive tissue at the end of the of severed leg, which made it bearable.

Grimshaw had decided to create a carnival.

The walls of the courtyard created a space fifteen feet wide, twenty feet deep, and three stories high. Warmth came from the commotion of excited Animalis bouncing up and down, pushing each other to get closer to the activities Grimshaw had designed. Their voices were high pitched, quickly squeaking out Russian and English.

One of the larger children pushed past Jax, knocking him to the side. “Watch it!” Jax shouted. The walls around him started to tip on their sides. He was falling over.

“Got you,” a hand gripped his and stopped the fall. “Hold onto my hand.” Grimshaw stood above him with an even more childish face than the ones running around them.

He let his hand wrap around hers and felt her pull him up. He tried to pay attention to the instructions she was giving him, showing him the bean bag toss where he would be giving out bracelets to winners, but the feeling of her hand in his overwhelmed his senses.

“And I’ll be giving rides with this.” Grimshaw held up the black flight suit he and Hank had used before.

She left him on a stool with a pile of bean-filled sacks on his lap. He watched her move past the crowd to where she had placed a table to take off and land from.

He turned away to find an army of faces waiting for him. His first customer was a small horse Animalis, her thick blonde hair braided in a continual French braid down her neck. Her eyes were large and glistening, and there was a ring of white around her nostrils where snot had dried.

“Pozhaluysta,” she said.

Jax tried to remember what the rules were that Grimshaw had told him. He handed her the three bags, and pointed to the line she had to stand behind. “Don’t cross that line.” Then he pointed to the wooden board propped against the wall with three holes in it. “You have to get at least one bag through a hole.” It seemed reasonable, but he wasn’t sure that’s what the rule was. He jingled the bracelets. “Then I’ll give you a bracelet.”

The little horse nodded. As she pulled the first bag over her head, her large tongue poked out and held tight to her upper lip, as if it aided her balance. She threw the bag and it flopped to the ground in front of the board.

She threw the second one harder and it slapped against the wall and slid to the ground.

Her eyes looked at Jax, scared that she might not get the prize. He raised his eyebrows.

The third throw was a mix of concentration and what looked like an effort to draw on magic powers. She kept her eyes on the board, held the sack with both hands, crouched like a tight spring, and then pushed up and out. The bag flew into the air and hit the side of the board. It stayed for a moment, then plopped to the ground without going through any of the holes.

Jax shook his head. “So close.”

The horse looked down at the ground, twisting her bare toes against the dirt. The next child, a badger-looking creature, ran past her and gathered the three bags.

Slowly the horse stepped back and other children moved in front of her, waiting for their turns.

He handed out the bracelets to the ones that put the bags through the holes, then watched the kids run to the crowd around Grimshaw. She took a bracelet and added it to her wrist, then strapped the excited rabbit Animalis against herself.

Jax watched Grimshaw float up into the air with rabbit Animalis clinging to the harness. Once they were a two yards above the table, she flew around the courtyard. Swoops and spins, graceful and elegant.

The child at the front of the line whinnied. “Pozhaluysta,” the small voice said.

It was the horse again. She held her hands up to take the bean bags.

Jax almost laughed at her stubborn determination to get the bracelet. He gave her the bags and watched.

Her arm came back behind her head and she launched the first one. Plop, on the ground. She spun, and flung the second one, but it flew away and bounced off the wall. The third one skidded across the ground and stopped when it hit the board.

Her breath was heavy, puffing out in quick bursts. The next child pushed past her and gathered up the bags. Jax could see tears swelling, glistening in her eyes. She disappeared behind the crowd that was starting to grow smaller as the afternoon crept nearer.

Jax gave out his last bracelet to a spotted deer Animalis, and the last of the children, some who had already gone for rides with Grimshaw, turned to leave.

The horse stayed standing as the others moved back into the building. Jax stood up and walked to her.

“You tried hard,” he said.

She kept her eyes on the board with holes in it.

He held his hand out for her to take. “Can I take you for a ride? Puzalshta?” He tried to use the word he assumed was please.

She looked up at him. Her eyes were wide with surprise. After a big sniff, she wiped her eyes and took his hand. “Spasibo,” she said. Her frustration was gone and she started to run, pulling him toward the table.

“I think it’s my turn to give a ride,” Jax said.

Grimshaw had landed and was letting a wide-eyed bird Animalis out of the harness.

“You want to?” She looked down at the horse. “Alright, it’ll just be a minute, sweetheart.”

Jax climbed into the straps and stuck the little diodes to the back of his neck. Below him, he could hear Grimshaw talking to the horse in Russian. The horse said something and Grimshaw laughed and looked up at Jax. “Chestno?” She stroked the little horse’s braids, “Ready?”

With the horse strapped in, Jax started to feel her excitement. She couldn’t hold still, looking up into the sky and bouncing in the harness.

The fans hummed to life and the two of them floated off the table. The horse gave a squeal. He started to imagine what was in her mind, the thrill of riding up, free from gravity, into the air.
I’d want to go fast
, Jax thought.

He increased speed, quickly climbing to the top of the three stories. At the top, he stopped and felt the weightlessness turn his belly over. They started to drop.

“Eeee! Nyeeeet!” the horse cried. She pulled frantically on the harness and kicked her legs in a wild panic.

“Oh, sorry, sorry.” Jax stopped the drop and stabilized in the air. He held her shoulders and kept trying to soothe her. “We’re okay. We’re not falling.” He hadn’t want to frighten her to death, poor thing. She was still struggling in a panic. He’d have to distract her from her fear.

“Oh, I have to sneeze!” he said loudly. “Ah-choo!” And he flew backward as if the fake sneeze had pushed them. “Wooo! That’s better.” He kept his voice loud, trying to occupy her attention.

She stopped kicking, but was still breathing hard.

“Do you get sneezy up here, too?” Jax asked.

She looked up at him, still scared.

“Like this? Ah-choo!” he said, and pushed them back a tiny bit.

She nodded. “Ah-choo.”

Jax pushed them back a few feet. “Wow! That’s a big sneeze!”

Her head turned up again with a timid smile. “Ah-choo,” she said with a little more enthusiasm.

Jax flew back again, turning to avoid the wall. “You want to go back down?” he asked.

She nodded.

“Alright, grab this rope.” Jax pretended to hand her a rope. “And pull us down. Like this.” He pulled his hands toward his chest, as if he were tugging on a rope, and made the fans lower them closer to the ground.

She nodded, as if convinced that it was the only way for them to get back down. Her eyes concentrated down at the table and she began to pull.

Jax slowly descended. By the time they reached the table, the little horse was bouncing up and down in the harness again, bubbling with excitement.

Grimshaw helped her out, and as the horse ran back to the building she called out, “Spasibo! Spasibo!”

When she had gone, the courtyard was empty except for Jax and Grimshaw. She smiled up at him. “That was so much fun to watch. I’m sure she feels like the most special kid here.”

Jax frowned. “I nearly made her cry, though. But it was fun.”

Grimshaw held her hand up to help Jax climb off the table. Jax took her hand, but an idea came to him. “Do you want to go up one more time? With me?”

Her eyes sparkled and the dimple appeared on her cheek. Her hand held tighter around Jax’s. She leaned forward to climb up, but then stopped. Jax could see her smile flatten. She paused, gazing at nothing. She let go of his hand.

“We’d better go in for lunch. You know how fast the food goes here. Come on, I’ll clean this up later.” When she looked back at him, her smile was back, but the sparkle had left her eyes.

Of course she wouldn’t go up with him. He had fooled himself into thinking they could pretend it was an innocent ride, like the Animalis children on their carnival ride. But being so close to her, held together by the harness … He could already feel the butterflies, moving around, brushing their delicate wings against the insides of his stomach. And she didn’t feel the same way, and wasn’t about to lead him on. It was stupid of him. Careless and stupid.

“Yeah, I’m starving,” he said. He sniffed the air, letting the smell of the food fuel his honest hunger.

“Maybe another time,” Grimshaw said, taking his hand again to help him down. She winked and squeezed his hand warmly.

He used a boost from the flight suit to ease off the table, letting Grimshaw’s hand guide him to the ground. While he took the harness off, Grimshaw kept talking.